Creating Cosmos from Chaos

I have been painting.  I can sense small changes and little breakthroughs in my work. The most important thing has been busily being about my work, just doing it. One day last week I only had a short amount of time so I pulled out a still life I had earlier rubbed out and set aside. Without a reference photo or set up, I completed it. It was loose and suggestive and scumbly and I loved it! So I immediately pulled out a toned canvas and quickly painted, in under an hour, an eye portrait of my grandson Caleb. I painted directly, very little drawing, just diving in and doing it. I also love this painting. 

Amusing

Amanda 3  8 X 10 in  oil on canvas panel

Amanda 4  8 X 10 in   oil on canvas panel

If you believe in "The Muse" who enables and inspires you to create works of art, then you operate under the assumption that this personal muse visits you at his pleasure and not always when you summon. If you believe, as I do, that the creative spirit is nurtured from within, then WHY oh WHY does it just vanish for days at a time? I am not referring to having little or no inspiration, but days in which I know not how to pick up a brush, to make a meaningful brush stroke! For instance, I had a very bad, terrible, rotten no-good afternoon two days ago. It was a verbal, conflicting, anxiety-producing kind of day, all things that block my ability to paint. I ended up wiping out two paintings which had started well but ended as pure dribble. I spat and fumed all night long, grumpy, frustrated and resentful. Yesterday I tucked my chin, hunkered-down and re-painted the two that I had wiped out, painting long into the night. And today I finished a third from that series. I wish I could blame it on my muse, but knowing better, seriously pleased that I worked my way through the blockage to produce these nice little eye portraits. Hope you enjoy them.

Caleb 3  8 X 10  oil on canvas panel

A Closer Look

The other day I was taking photos of something on my easel and as I was lowering my iPad to place it on my lap I noticed the camera had focused on the paint tray of the easel.  I snapped three or four images and chose one to paint.  This old easel is one that Lindenwood's art department "recycled" when they remodeled their painting studio a few years ago.  I claimed it and have loved it for all it's crusty sturdiness.  It's huge, bulky and difficult to crank!  But the best part of the photo was the years of accumulated paint, ink and who knows what else.   Anyway, it was a joy to paint this and I hope you enjoy it.

 A Closer Look  
18 X 24 in   oil on canvas

Primed

Introversion   5 X 5 ft  oil on canvas

The definition of introversion that works best for me is this: despite the fact that I love people, the energy I expend in talking to and being with them is limited and does not get refilled until I am alone and pursuing other goals. Usually all that is necessary to recharge my battery is a quick nap or an hour in the garden.  But recently I feel like I've been zapped, drained, depleted.  It's as if I need to "prime the pump," pull out the choke and flood my engine.... something to push me over the red line.  Nothing is wrong in my life.... nothing. In fact, seeking to find a "reason" is self-indulgent and narcissistic and doesn't help one little bit. Have you ever tried to water a houseplant when its soil has gotten completely dry?  The water runs right through the soil into the saucer.  It seems contradictory, but to get dry soil to absorb water you have to moisten the soil first.   I feel just like that.... my soil has gone too dry and all the good things in my life seem to flow right through me without being absorbed.  And I don't know what is needed to do that pre-moisturizing of my soul.  This painting is an exercise in pure expressionism, a stream of consciousness that reflects some of the subjects I have painted over the last year.   It is a dark story told in passionate calligraphic strokes, intensely personal and mysterious, even to me.  I do not feel primed.  Yet.  I will continue to search through all means, including paint.  I hope you enjoy it.

Candy Dish

This was a fun, challenging little set up.  The dish, an antique from my great grandmother's collection, is a family treasure, despite the fact that it has no real value.  It has a lot of intricate embossed designs, which I choose to barely indicate. I'm finding I have more success in attempting complex designs than in the simple ones because it requires me to switch to my right brain mode and paint only what I see, and less, rather than what I THINK I see. I hope you enjoy it.

Eggplant and Onion

Today's painting of the day is a quick still life study.... took little time but lots of seeing.  I want to simplify my daily paintings so that I can accomplish them in a few hours and not stress over them.  The hardest thing for me is deciding what to paint and I often wanderer around for hours without ever coming up with a suitable composition.  So, instead I am going to throw things up and paint them quickly and see what I can see.  Hope you enjoy it!

Too Little

Kendra 8X10 in oil on canvas panel

I am trying to find something to paint for my daily challenges and I keep reverting to the figure.  It's one thing to paint them well on a larger scale but to bring life to a tiny figure is a tremendous challenge for me.  I am not a master of the delicate brush nor of brevity. My inspiration is Stephen Early (http://www.stephenearly.com). I researched one of his tiny nudes, zoomed in to discern his brilliance of draftsmanship, delicacy, detail and tried to translate it into what I was painting. I started with a bad iPad, photo, fuzzy, poorly lit and I struggled just like every other time I've worked on this scale... I don't know... we'll see.  I might hide it in a day or a week or month. Hope you enjoy it.

Afterthought

I am a portrait painter that doesn't know how to paint anything else!  I can't paint landscape, still life, or any combinations of all three with much success.  Ergo, I always revert to what makes me happy and leave off the schoolin' that I need to become a better painter all around.  So, as much as it bores me, I'm going to pursue a few weeks of still life and see if I can find something to amaze and delight me.... because then I know it will delight you too.  Today's painting is a set up using a candle stick than is so tarnished it's hard to tell if it's silver or brass.  Hope you enjoy it.

Figurative Works

Two of my recent pieces, The Dancer and Eric were chosen for Figurative Works, a juried competition at the Foundry Art Centre in Saint Charles, Missouri.  I was absoLUTELY blown away at the honor of being included in this showing.  There were over two hundred applications and only 46 artists' work was chosen. And the quality was amazing, diverse, and fantastic.  They will be hanging for 5 1/2 more weeks.

My Right Arm

I painted this in response to a call for art that I have chosen to interpret through my own aging. This arm and hand shows just a bit of the wrinkles and arthritis that is beginning to take it's toll. I painted using the grissaille technique and then washed in some layers of color. Hope you enjoy it!

Is it Done Yet?

What do you think?  I love the grissaille underpainting and fully intended to glaze in the skin tones but my sister said I should just leave it as it is.  Soooooo, I'm just putting it out for a day or two to see what ya'll think.  Hope you enjoy it.

I am happy to announce that two of my pieces have been selected for a local show at the Foundry Art Centre in Saint Charles, Missouri.  The show is called Figurative Works and opens this weekend, the reception Friday night.  The two paintings are 'The Dancer' and 'Eric.'  It's such an honor to have anything selected so I am doubly pleased.  If you are in the area, please drop by for this free event from 6-8 PM on Jan. 24, have a glass of wine and some nibblies and check out this great space.